To combat the hospitality doldrums of late, some marauding tactics are needed. Restaurants are big, unwieldy and expensive to run. Where else can we get good, carefully sourced vittles? How about da club?
Using “club” in a very loose sense of the word, a place where people drink, are merry and shake what their mothers/fathers/caregivers gave them. Under those parameters, The Haggerston is such a spot, open until 3am, extensive smoking area bathed in red light, cool young things flitting this way and that, sticky floors, unmentionable toilets. In short, a space pummelled within an inch of its structural integrity by the braying masses, now serving...bread cakes?
Yes, Artie, blue bandana over his head, one gold earring swinging, years of experience in the restaurant industry, has been popping up for the last three weeks, nifty logo, slogan (“love, kindness and sick f*kn sarnies”) and Polaroid camera at the ready in one of Dalston's most popular temples of infamy. Only at the weekends, six sarnies could be yours, all for the… price… of £12.50 ps (per sarnie).
I already spied a familiar name and, when asked, learned the Henderson's fish fillet is from the Brixham-based anglers of my home county. Capers stab their salty bitterness through it, lemon and dill mayo double down, binding the sopping log into a creamy, fishy fandango encased in brioche about the length of your forearm.
The skirt steak (why a meat-pleat?) has Kerrygold butter melding into the grilled cow, onions and caciocavallo cheese escaping somehow from its mummy-like wrappings and onto everything you hold dear. Romesco is the only vegan option but does not feel lacking; the crusty torpedo bun is firm yet soft inwards, marinated aubergine, rocket and peanut avoiding the slosh that plant lovers are often relegated too.
Black pepper fried chicken makes my knees weak. More peanuts, pickled mooli and fermented chilli sauce all combine into what Subway was aiming to do all those years ago, just without the shed tonne of salt, disappointment and Irish legal difficulty. An utterly disarming sandwich.
There is La Sovrana for the more classic Italian/NYC experience, Tuscan salami, prosciutto, chilli and tomato relish, or the Iberico Katsu for those looking for a trip even further East, pork collar, more mooli, cabbage and apple tonkatsu sauce.
Are there plates? No. Are there sides or desserts? No. Is it a little triggering to eat at an admittedly pretty wooden booth across from a pillar that you pole-danced/crumpled down a couple of weeks ago after a few too many? Yes, yes, it certainly is. Nevertheless, if you like sarnies, carefully procured ingredients and the residual fumes of a good time, boy oh boy, do I have a pub/club/deli for you.
Artie's Sarnies
The Haggerston
438 Kingsland Rd
E8 4AA
